“A baby!? We’re having a baby!?”
“No, not A baby…three babies!”
“How am we ever going to handle a new baby, let alone three new babies?!”
“I have two hands, I have two boobs, and there are two of us. NOT THREE!
“How will I have the time to go about everyday tasks when I have to care for multiple babies?”
All of these thoughts swirl through your head as you feel both thrilled and a sense of panic.
When you realize you are having multiples, you start to imagine changing multiple diapers, getting multiple tiny humans dressed for the day and having multiple little mouths screaming at you while you’re just trying to eat a few bites of your breakfast in the morning.
Fear not. Despite the multiple challenges, you will find the joys in having multiples.
Whether by dressing them in matching outfits, having multiple babies to snuggle before bed or enjoying more than one little face smiling back at you, you WILL find the joy in multiples over time.
Yes, multiples may be a lot of work, but who are we kidding? All babies are a lot of work!
Over time, families having multiples find a “new norm” just as singleton families do. It just takes a little extra preparation to get you through the transition.
We know finding out you are expecting multiples can be overwhelming. So after you catch your breath, it’s time to get started in figuring out how you are going to survive this transition.
Tips for preparing for multiples
First, remember, the timeline for “all the things” gets moved up. Take your birth and parenting classes early. Most multiples arrive between 30-34 weeks. Some arrive even before this, so just be prepared with an “Any Day” mentality.
Find support groups before the babies arrive, so you know where to turn if or when you are struggling, if you have have questions or just need someone who gets where you are. Find things to do out of the house… mom’s group, sitting at La Colombe drinking coffee, or a walk around the block can make all the difference in your mental and emotional health.
Arrange for help and accept all kinds of offers. Food prep? Yes please. Laundry? Thank you! A visit which includes an extra set of hands? Yes, we would love that. Help hiring a highly qualified postpartum doula? ABSOLUTELY!!!
By creating an intentional schedule, you will find yourself set up for success and you will limit transition times caused by repeating the same act over and over. Putting all of your babies on the same schedule may provide you with a few moments of downtime each day.
Feed all the babies at the same or as close to the same time as possible. Remember that fed is best. Whether breastfed or formula fed, feed your baby guilt free, because a FED baby is what matters. You can create an alternating schedule to allow you time to hold one baby during each feeding to increase the bonding experience.
After feeding, they will likely be ready to sleep. Put them down for a nap at the same time. When the babies nap… you should nap! It sounds crazy, but parents who fill their cup first have energy for other tasks. You might also alternate sleep with some coffee and “me” time.
Be prepared to change each baby when the first needs a diaper. When one goes they likely will all go.
If you find this challenging or prefer to follow the babies’ lead, our doulas are highly trained and prepared to support your family’s plan. When you feel like you just can’t go on, ask for help! You are not alone, and whether you have one baby or multiple babies, everyone needs help at some point. Go through everyday knowing that YOU ARE ENOUGH. Not everyone is blessed to be a parent to multiples.
By: Jalecia Reichart
